All Moms wish they can be in more than one place at once. And all Moms work. Inside the home, outside the home, and everywhere in between.
I’ve tried to deny this at different times in my life. But the truth is, I’ll never feel 100% in the office, at home with my kids, with friends, or organizing. And I’ve grown to be okay with that. As women, we wear numerous hats, and to pretend hats are completely taken off and not thought about again until they match an outfit another day is ridiculous. Hat head remains, as do the colors that made the hat work in the first place.
Last Monday I began working a more “traditional” job for the first time in 14 months. I’ve been freelancing & content creating, pouring dreams into Raising Imagination and raising three toddlers under four for over a year now. It’s been simultaneously the hardest and best thing I’ve ever done.
But when the opportunity arose to join the progressive, brilliant, creative staff at Middle Collegiate Church, I couldn’t turn it down. And while I couldn’t be more excited about this new adventure, last Monday I was pretty darn sad about saying goodbye to being my own boss, flexible hours, and, though it’s hard to admit, quality time at home with my toddlers.
Am I doing the right thing? They’re only this young once and it goes by so quickly!! Is 40+ hours of daycare too long for 2 and 4-year-olds? Who’s doing drop-off? (You’re reliving all same questions in your head right now, Mom, I can almost hear your heart-tugging.)
I kissed my kids goodbye and, not trying too hard to push back tears, bravely began the commute to my new job. Pulling out my phone, a Facebook memory from 3 years prior came up. It included the picture above of little Z catching me on the nightly news talking about the homeless crisis in NYC, and these words
”While pondering the question every mother ponders: to work inside the home or outside the home as well, someone once told me that if the work you do outside the home attempts to make make the world a better place for your children, then do that work and do it well. Z, I work to create a more loving, accepting, and just world for you. I'm glad you got to see me today.
Some might thank Zuckerberg for such a serendipitous memory. I’ll never give him that much credit. The Spirit of God at work in the world? Speaking to us at times and in ways that help us move forward, even when the ground is scary? Yup. That’s what I’m crediting. So thanks, Spirit, for showing up just when I need help to imagine.
To moms everywhere feeling the tug of this dance, you’re not alone. And you don’t need to pretend to be one dimensional in any space of your life. I hope serendipitous reminders fill your world this week and every week. You’re doing a good job. You’re doing exactly what you should be doing, and your children, OUR children, are better for it. Now do your work and do it well.